Winner Take All Transcript (Novelization)

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Teaser

Iolaus: "Ooh, look out Corinth. The academy team has arrived. OK, who wants to teach these guys who's boss, huh?"

Hercules: "Hey, uh-- why don't you start with that guy right there?"

Iolaus: "Uh-- naa, I-- don't wanna hurt him."

Hercules: "Ah-- oh."

Jason: "Yo, is this where we sign up for the competition?"

Official: "No. I just sit here in the hot sun, handing out headbands for my health. Name?"

Jason: "Jason of Corinth."

Official: "Prince Jason? F-forgive me, your Highness. Here-- have a headband. A-and some for your friends, too."

Lilith: "Oh, cool."

Iolaus: "Hmm, thank you."

Lilith: "Thanks."

Hercules: "Thank you."

Iolaus: "Ooh-- I am gonna like this place. You drop the right name and, service with a smile. Hah!"

Hercules: "Hey. What's wrong?"

Jason: "I was just thinkin'. Next time the games are held, I'll be a king. And I'll be handin' out prizes, not competing for ‘em."

Hercules: "Ah-- you'll forget all about that, once we win the Gymkhana relay, right?"

Lilith: "Hey-- I wish they had more than three runners on each team."

Iolaus: "Well, I'll wrestle you for my spot on the team."

Lilith: "In your dreams."

Hercules: "Hey, listen. Your time will come, Lilith, OK? Listen, once Prince Charming becomes king, we're gonna need somebody to help us defend our title. Hmm?"

Vendor: "Almonds, dates, and prunes! Come on! Get your figs over here! Come on. You wanna buy one of these? This is where it's at. Ahh!"

Pollux: "You fool! Why don't you watch where you're going?"

Vendor: "I'm sorry. I-I didn't see you there."

Pollux: "Do you know who I am? Huh? I'm the Olympic champion. Stay out of my way! Or else!"

Hercules's Voice: "You all right?"

Hercules: "What's the problem, here? He said he was sorry, OK? There's-there's no harm done."

Pollux: "Stay out of this."

[Fight]

Iolaus: "What the-- ?"

Hercules: "That was uncalled for."

Lilith: "Hercules."

Hercules: "Ah! Ah!"

Pollux: "Ha-ha-ha. I toldja to keep out of this. Ha-ha-ha."

Act One

Pollux: "I toldja to keep out of this."

Castor: "Pollux! That's no way for a son of Zeus to act-- brawling like a common mortal."

Hercules: "Whoa, whoa-- whoa, wait a second. You're a son 'a Zeus?"

Pollux: "Yeah. You wanna make something of it?"

Hercules: "Wait, no, no, it's just, uh-- well, I'm a son 'a Zeus, too."

Castor: "But-- that means we're _half-brothers_. Pollux, we have another brother!"

Pollux: "That's what he says. If you know what's good for you-- you better not compete against me."

Castor: "You'll have to excuse Pollux. He's always like that before a competition. I'm Castor of Sparta."

Hercules: "I'm Hercules. These are my friends."

Castor: "I can't believe it! Another brother. Uh-- l-look-- why don't you and your friends have dinner with us, tonight?"

Iolaus: "Yeah, right! He threw a fig vendor at me!"

Castor: "A-- as a-as a kind of apology."

Hercules: "Hey, listen. We'd love to."

Pollux's Voice: "Castor."

Castor: "See ya tonight at the inn."

Hercules: "Yeah. Huh."

Jason: "What's the matter with you, man? I don't wanna share a meal with those guys."

Hercules: "Hey-- this is very important to me, OK?"

Iolaus: "OK, but-- we better start meeting some of your sisters."

Hercules: "OK."

Woman's Voice: "Smell that. The head of lilies-- "

Castor: "We grew up in a village outside Sparter [sic]. Mother tried to keep us away from other people. Well, Hercules can appreciate it, but the rest of you don't know what it's like when you tell somebody Zeus is your father."

Hercules: "Yeah. Kids can be cruel. Listen, uh-- the big question. Have you met Zeus?"

Castor: "Never even seen him. If he wasn't our father-- I wouldn't even believe he exists."

Hercules: "I'll tell ya-- listen-- you guys have no idea how many times, when I was a kid, I just wish that I had a normal father, like everyone else. You know?"

Castor: "We all wish that. But we can't change what we are."

Pollux: "All I wanna do is make everybody that laughed at us when we were kids eat their words. That's why I became an athlete-- to rub their noses in it. Well-- I beat the best that their cities have to offer, and they cheer! Me! The one they _used_ to laugh at. They gave me this when I won the games at Amphipolis. And this-- when I beat Niopus in the Olympic Pancrateon."

Jason: "I heard that Niopus was hurt so bad he may never walk again."

Pollux: "Yeah?"

Jason: "That's one of the reasons why we dropped-- the Pancrateon from our games."

Pollux: "Well, I heard you got soft here in Corinth."

Jason: "Ya ready?"

Hercules: "Uh, uh-- listen, I-I think I'm gonna-I'm gonna stay-- so, I'll catch up with you guys, later?"

Lilith: "Yeah-- whatever."

Hercules: "Ooh."

Pollux's Voice: "What's wrong with them?"

Castor: "I think they got tired of listening to you read out your record scroll." [They laugh.]

Jason: "Hey."

Hercules: "Huh?"

Jason: "So, uh-- where you been?"

Hercules: "What? Oh, oh, yeah, yeah-- sorry about that. It's just, uh-- man, by the time we got finished talkin' last night, it was so late, I-I didn't wanna walk back to the palace, so, I just-- I stayed the night with Pollux and Castor."

Jason: "Oh. Well, they're, uh-- they're gonna start the race."

Hercules: "Oh."

Jason: "Yeah."

Hercules: "Yeah."

Jason: [Interrupting]: "I think we wasted enough time waitin' around for you all morning, so--"

Hercules: "I didn't think it mattered."

Lilith: "Yahhhhhh!"

Pollux: "Yes!"

Crowd: "Ohhh!" "Yeah!" "Wow!" "All right!"

Pollux: "Where'd ya learn how to do that?"

Hercules: "Awww-- I-I just got lucky-- you know? I mean-- you hit the mark first. You just gave me something to aim at."

Castor: "Hey-- Hercules-- why don't you join Pollux and me in the Gymkhana relay?"

Pollux: "Yeah. W-w-we've never had a team, before."

Hercules: "Uh-- uh, uh-- hmm, I can't. Uh-- Jason and Iolaus and I have always been a team."

Castor: "But we'd be the sons of Zeus."

Pollux: "Nobody could beat us."

Hercules: "The sons of Zeus? OK. Hold on a second. I'll be back. Sorry. Hey."

Jason: "Nice throw."

Hercules: "Hey-- thanks."

Jason: "Stretch out. Gymkhana's next."

Hercules: "Yeah, uh-- that's what I wanted to talk to you about. Listen, uh-- Castor and Pollux kind of want me to be on their team?"

Iolaus: [Chuckles]: "So, you said, ‘No,' right?"

Hercules: "Well-- well, uh-- well, I just thought that, you know, th-they need an extra runner to be on their team, and I thought that if Lilith joined your team-- "

Jason: "I don't believe this. You wanna be on Pollux's Team?"

Hercules: "Come on, guys. Just give him a chance, OK? No offense or anything, but-- you don't really understand what it's like growing up being a son of Zeus."

Jason: "No, I don't understand. But I know we're your friends-- and they're your brothers. That's more important to you, so-- go join ‘em."

Hercules: "Come on. Listen."

Jason: "Go ahead, man. We don't needja."

Hercules: "Fine."

Voice: "Go!"

Iolaus: "OK, stand back, Herc. I need plenty of room to run."

Hercules: "Oh-- there'll be plenty of room-- behind me."

Iolaus: "Oh, is that Zeus?"

Castor: "Hercules! Wha-- ? Go! Go! Go!"

Iolaus: "Hey!"

Hercules: "Got enough room back there?!"

Pollux: "Get ready to eat my dust, rich boy."

Jason: "Dream on."

Hercules's Voice: "Pollux, go!"

Iolaus: "Go!"

Jason: "Whoa, whoa!"

Act Two

Jason: "No!"

Pollux: [Laughs]

Castor: "Yeah, Pollux!"

Pollux: "Sons of Zeus!"

Pollux and Hercules and Castor: "Sons of Zeus! Sons of Zeus! Sons of Zeus!"

Iolaus: "You know? I would really like to let some of that wind out of that air-bag, Pollux."

Lilith: "Jason, what happened?"

Iolaus: "Whoa. Whoa. You OK?"

Jason: "You may be a son 'a Zeus-- but you're also a cheater."

Castor: "You cheated?"

Pollux: "What's the matter, rich boy? Can't admit that someone's better than you?"

Jason: "Ah, you're no better than any other cheater, Pollux."

Pollux: "Nobody! Calls me a cheat!"

Hercules: "Whoa-- take it easy."

Jason: "You're gonna learn. Someday you're gonna learn you gotta play by the rules-- even a son of Zeus."

Pollux: "Are you challenging me?"

Jason: "Yeah."

Pollux: "Yes. Yes! Then I get to choose. [Chuckles] Hmm-- the Pancrateon-- the ultimate event."

Hercules: "Now, come on, guys. Listen-- that is _way_ too dangerous."

Pollux: "No, you challenged me! Accept! Or let everybody here see that the big-shot leader of Corinth is afraid!"

Hercules: "Oh-- come on, Pollux."

Jason: "Here we go. Let's do it!"

Lilith: "No, Jason!"

Iolaus: "Jason, take it easy!"

Pollux: "Meet me here when the horn blows-- if you're man enough to."

Castor: "I'll go and-- talk to Pollux."

Hercules: "Yeah. I'll talk to Jason."

Castor: "OK."

Iolaus: "Jason, I don't know how you expect to fight with those ribs."

Jason: "Make it tighter."

Hercules: "He's right, Jason. Listen-- you don't have to do this, OK? This is all my fault."

Jason: "I'm gonna be a king, soon. How am I supposed to lead Corinth if everybody thinks I backed down to this guy?"

Iolaus: "Uh-- excuse me for butting in, but, uh-- well-- he is a demigod. Ha-ha-ha."

Lilith: "Come on, Jason-- don't do it."

Hercules: "Listen. Jason, wait-- listen. This has _nothing_ to do with being afraid, OK? You're hurt. He's the son of a god."

Jason: "That's enough! I'm _sick_ of all this ‘Sons of Zeus' stuff! It's garbage! My father may not be a god-- but that doesn't make Pollux-- or Castor, or _you_ any better than me! Now, I'm gonna face this guy! If you don't like it-- you stay here!"

Hercules's Voice: "Jason!"

Guard: "Your Highness."

Castor: "Please, Pollux. Don't do this."

Pollux: "You're always apologizing for ol' dumb Pollux. I'm Zeus' son. I don't have to _apologize_ to anybody."

Castor: "A son of Zeus should care about honor. We have a responsibility-- "

Pollux: "I don't care! I'm better than them! Better than all of them."

Castor: "Pollux, we-- "

Pollux: "Be quiet."

Hercules: "Pollux! What do you think you're doin'?! What just happened?"

Castor: "He's out of control."

Iolaus: "OK, Jason-- I want you to float like a butterfly-- sting like a wasp."

Jason: "Yeah. What? What does that mean?"

Lilith: "It means, just keep moving."

Pollux: "Whoever's left standing when the sand runs out-- wins."

Iolaus: "Eye of the tiger, baby. Eye of the tiger. Come on. Yeah. Yeah. You're good, you're good. Yeah."

[Fight]

Iolaus: "Hey-- watch your footwork! Keep your fists up. Yeah. Ooh. Ooh."

Pollux: "Ah-ah-- stay down, rich boy. Admit it, I've won. Ha-ha-ha-ha."

Jason: "Never!"

Lilith: "Yeah! Ha-ha!"

Iolaus: "Yeah!"

Jason: "Sand's run out, Pollux-- and I'm still standin'. You lose."

Iolaus: "Hey!"

Jason: "And I played by the rules."

Hercules: "Jason! Look out!"

Castor: "Pollux, no!"

Hercules: "Wanna hear sum'in' funny? I used to think, because we had the same father, we shared sum'in' special, but you know what? There's nothin' special about you."

Pollux: "Watch your mouth, kid. I'll show you what it means to be a son of Zeus."

Hercules: "One of these days, you'll learn, Pollux. It's not who your father is. It's who you are."

[Fight]

Castor: "No. No. No. No. I think we're gonna have to let the two of them work it out themselves. It's a brother thing. All right? OK?"

Hercules: "Here."

Castor: "Pollux-- "

Pollux: "Please! Leave-- me alone!"

Castor: "I'm sorry, Hercules-- but he is my brother-- the only one I've had until now."

Hercules: "You got another one now. OK? Don't forget it. All right. Take care of yourself, OK? Ah-- I'm in trouble, aren't I? Listen, guys, I'm sorry. You know, I-- I got a problem. I hear the word, ‘Zeus,' and I forget everything that's important."

Jason: "Well, I guess that we were just afraid that-- new brothers would take the place of old friends."

Hercules: "Aw."

Iolaus: "Hmm?"

Hercules: "Hey."

Iolaus: "Hmm?"

Hercules: "Hey-- you guys are my brothers."

Lilith: "Hey-- what about me?"

Hercules: "Well, you're a brother, too-- you know? Just, uh-- well-- kind of. [They laugh.] Let's get back to the academy."